My prayer today....

Today I prayed through various Psalms....it was a beautiful worshipful time with my Dad....

Father,

     It is 2 days until Christmas--my heart is overflowing! Time is flying by and yet you are still the unchangeable perfectness you were in the beginning of everything.  Today I PRAISE you for you glorious rule and reign over the whole earth and over time and space, over my heart and my plans for this day! "The earth is LORD's and everything in it, the world and all who live in it." Psalm 24:1

    I CONFESS all my sin, the iniquity of my heart.  All the ways that I exalt myself and act against Your ways.  Cleanse me and I will be clean. "Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me." Psalm 51:2-3

     I rejoice and give thanks to You for Your unfailing lovingkindness!  Your ways are great and I delight in you with all my heart!  Thank you for all your gifts of goodness and your nearness which sustains me! "Shout for joy to the Lord all the earth, Worship the Lord with gladness! Come into His presence with THANKSGIVING  and into His courts with praise!" "Bless the LORD oh my soul and all that is within me bless His holy name! Bless the LORD oh my soul and forget none of His benefits....who pardons all my iniquities, who heals all my diseases, who redeems my life from the pit, who crowns me with lovingkindness and compassion, and who satisfies my years with good things so that my youth is renewed like the eagles." Psalm 100, Psalm 103

     I pray that you will sustain me with a willing spirit! My heart is prone to wander and my heart and my flesh to fail. Let Your nearness be my good! Establish your KINGDOM in my heart and my family's heart. Let them trust in you with all their hearts and lean not in their own ways! Let their lives shine before men--that you are exalted!  No matter what we feel or how wronged we may be by others or how difficult the day becomes may we be filled with JOY because of Your presence in us and all around us! Open our eyes that we may behold wonderful things in your law.  

    My heart is overwhelmed with Your reality Father....keep my eyes on You like I am in this moment all day today, wherever You lead me!  For your glory and my joy I ask these things in the name of Jesus, Amen.

     

"All things work together for good...."

     "All things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose" Romans 8:28 tells us.  I have used this verse zillions of times when I struggle with my own circumstances--it is a source of comfort and assurance that I will survive whatever difficulty or disappointment I am enduring at the moment.  God is showing me what this verse means to Him.....I think He has a little different perspective on it.
     Our team has been studying the book of Deuteronomy the past few months and it has enlarged my view of God's sovereignty and it has frightened me at times.  It is frightening to really consider the nature of God in His reality rather than from the reality I want it to be.  We have talked about difficult situations in the story of the Israelites and God's purpose to make Himself know to all the Nations through them.  Some of these stories seem so harsh toward the people on planet earth.  But as I allowed my heart to ask hard questions and to ponder the goodness of God alongside the justice of God and His holiness, I began to see MORE than I had before.
     God is really big, really good, and so full of mercy.  BUT He doesn't share His glory with anyone or anything and He UNASHAMEDLY removes from the planet people and nations who continually defy His lordship.  And this is where Romans 8:28 comes onto the scene for me.  Somehow I began to meditate on this verse in light of the new things I was seeing about God from Deuteronomy.  "All things work together for good....." and I am seeing that this is the same good that God is working out in the Old Testament.  The good that all peoples will know Him and choose to worship Him above anything else because He knows He is the BEST that we can have and ALL  that we need!  So with the difficulties of the people of Israel and all the other nations we read about that just get wiped away or that suffer hardship--we see God working it all for GOOD...for His exaltation among the Nations.
     Likewise, in my life, all things are working for good, but not for my good, but His GOOD.  Which means His exaltation on this planet.  This means that as I pray Romans 8:28 for myself and for those I love, I must remember what God's GOOD really is.  It isn't my happiness or my comfort or my safety.  This means some things are not going to work out the way I want them to and some things are going to feel very bad.  We see this over and over in scripture.  We see it in the Christmas story....Joseph had to have felt that Mary giving birth to the Son of God in a dirty, nasty stable wasn't very good.  I am sure he felt like he wasn't providing for his new wife very well and I am sure He wondered if his vision of the Angel was really just a dream.  But it was for God's GOOD....the exaltation of His great love for all of His people.  So Mary giving birth in a dirty place was GOOD.
    For me, living far from home and thinking of living so far from Hannah Beth next year doesn't seem very good.  It makes me question whether we should have chosen a better time to make this transition?  Surely there is a better way to serve the Lord and still be more "comfortable" with our final years parenting our kids?  But I believe it is for His GOOD that I am here....His exaltation among the Nations.
     Tonight I met with my Thai language teacher; who is a follower of Christ.  We met for just a few moments to talk about a group of Thai children she is teaching about Jesus Christ.  And in the middle of a busy street under a beautiful star-filled sky she recognized that I was a little discouraged and God used her to speak to my heart.  She quoted Romans 8:28 to me.  She had no idea that this verse had been rattling around in my head for a few weeks and that I was wondering how this struggle to live in a new place and to be so far from my daughter was all working out for "my" good....but God spoke through her to remind me that I am here, in this place, for HIS GOOD.  His EXALTATION in the country of Thailand among a people He created for Himself to know Him.   And that it might not feel good and He might not change that.  I drove away feeling overwhelmed with His goodness for me and for all of His people.  I am so thankful that He makes Himself known to me so faithfully and patiently....I have so much yet to learn.